Marriage problems vary. But their causes tend to have similar patterns. And their solutions tend to have similar patterns. Understand the principles at work behind the problems and their solutions, and you will quickly find yourself a happy husband, in a happy marriage, with a happy wife eager to please you.
Let us get straight into them:
Step 1: Take Charge Of Your Relationship
What does that mean? It means that solving your marriage problems is in your hands. No one else. Not your wifes. Not a friends. Not a counselors. Her end of the relationship is merely a reaction to you. If you end up always reacting to her, then you will end up with a cycle of marriage problems that you can not seem to break out of.
So, instead of leaving your relationship to itself, or leaving it to your wife, take charge of it!
If your problems are about how she is treating you, recognize that she is merely reacting to how you are. If you are different, her response will be different. Let me repeat that for you, because everything builds on that point. If you are different, her response will be different.
So do not blame her. You may think she is being unfair. How could she be that way?! Well, because she is responding to how you are with her right now. So start acting as if your relationship is 100% in your hands.
Step 2: Appreciate That Marriage Problems Are Typically Emotional
Now that you are ready to take charge of your relationship and take responsibility for it, you need to recognize why you have marriage problems.
Up to this point, you have failed to spark the right emotions in her. That is the only reason you have lost her.
Your problems are due to emotional reasons and not logical or moral reasons. They may be clothed in logical or moral reasons, but those aren't the real reasons. Those are merely her rationalizing her emotions. Understand that.
If you spark in her the right emotions, you will find her rationalizing illogical and even immoral behavior. To justify, follow her emotions. Simple.
Warning: Once you understand how to spark her emotions, you will find you have a lot of influence over her. So use it with care! As they say, with great power, comes great responsibility.
When sparking her emotions, you need to be a man about it, and take care of your woman. Use your influence over her with care, and she will love you and thank you forever. What does that mean on a practical level? It means a few things. Just as your marriage problems are because you pressed the wrong emotional buttons, the solution is to press the right emotional buttons. It's that simple. That is the good news.
It also means that you need to stop trying to convince her with rational and moral arguments. Convince her with emotional arguments.
What do I mean by convince her with emotional arguments? I mean influence her by affecting her emotions, by inspiring in her emotions of attraction, rather than emotions of repulsion. Because that is all that has happened: she has responded with repulsion to how you are, but she can just as easily respond to how you are with attraction. This brings me to the next step.
Step 3: Press The Right Emotional Buttons To Create Attraction
It is simple if you make your wife more attracted to you, you will find that most of your marriage problems will take care of themselves.
Some Common Marriage Problems: My wife does not listen to me. My marriage feels flat. My wife does not respect me. My wife is not interested in sex. And so on.
The Real Problem is: You are missing one or more of the foundations of attraction. If you make her attracted to you, you will find her far more attentive, exciting, playful, radiant, respectful, cheerful (giggly, in fact), seductive, and eager to please you. So make sure you maintain the foundations of attraction at all times.
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